tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-59980774694722690462024-03-05T06:28:38.643-06:00Journey to baby ChambersA blog about our struggle with infertility and a hopeful journey to starting a family.Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.comBlogger73125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-73444855596240230202014-04-11T11:32:00.000-05:002014-04-11T11:32:17.643-05:00Surprise <div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">A few weeks ago my friend asked me if I would share my story at her birthday party. She explained she was inviting women in her life who have impacted her and she wanted a few of us to share how God impacted us. She was having the party at a local coffee shop and I envisioned a small group of us sitting at the table...visiting, drinking coffee and just hanging out. When I arrived to the party, I saw this:</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Wait. What?!?! Also, what you can't see in this image are the 40 chairs sitting in a circular shape surrounding this stage. 40 chairs filled with people I really didn't know and then it was time to share my story. So, I thought I'd post what I wrote for the occasion and celebrate Nola's 15 month birthday today. Enjoy.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"Hello. My name is Audrey and I’m
a control freak. I always knew I had control issues, but it wasn’t until last
night after our life group that I realized where those stemmed from. One of the
most important things for kids is stability. Kids thrive on a schedule –
knowing when they will get up and get dressed for school, knowing who will pick
them up, knowing what time dinner will be and when they will go to bed after
baths and homework. The environment I grew up in was quite the opposite. There
were a lot of uncertainties and the one thing I could control was myself. I
could count on me. So, I controlled what I could and held on tightly to that
power. I became extremely independent and pretty self-sufficient. And as I grew
older, I prided myself on being able to take care of me in spite of everything
I had been through. And I know God used my desire to control every situation to
break me down and show me He was in control all along. That power does not and
did not ever belong to me. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I knew what infertility was. I
knew its name and saw it in my sister and best friend’s life. I knew it existed
and that it was sad and bothersome. I knew it. I was aware. I saw it change her
life and the people around her. I saw it from a distance. I knew what
infertility was. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But, I didn’t really know it. I
didn’t realize that I would become intimately familiar with infertility. I
didn’t realize how close we would become…the two of us. Me, with my young and
pretty healthy self. And infertility with her ugliness, her pain and her
downright ability to suck the life out of a person (quite literally, actually,
but figuratively too). <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My husband and I always knew we
wanted kids. Two, to be exact. A boy first, and then a girl would be great.
But, as long as they were healthy, we didn’t really care. And we weren’t just
saying that. Aren’t we nice? So, we waited until we decided we were ready and
then we started trying. I’d been on birth control for many years, so we were
thrilled when we got pregnant right away after trying. Everything was going
well and then we went in for our 8 week appointment to find no heartbeat and no
explanation why. Two pregnancies and two miscarriages later, I found myself
losing control. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Then, came all the technical talk. You don’t have enough follicles.
That’s weird. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">They aren’t big enough. That’s not good. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You have cysts on your ovaries. That will make things difficult. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You could remove the fibroids through surgery, but it’s dangerous. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Your periods are irregular. That isn’t good. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Unexplained infertility. Unexplained anything is hard for someone with
control issues. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When you are infertile, EVERYONE
around you is pregnant or has kids. Everyone. And everyone is asking you when
you might start a family. And all you are is the empty shell of a woman who
longs for that beyond what anyone can understand. You want a big belly, you
want screaming kiddos, you want to figure it all out and fix whatever part of
you is broken. But, you can’t. You realize you can’t do it on your own. So, you
start looking for places where you can count on someone else to fix you. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Sometimes this part gets
dangerous and unhealthy. But, if you are smart, you turn to God. And you
realize that He is the only one that can help you through infertility or any
difficult situation. God knows the desires of your heart and He will fulfill
those according to His plan. I can sit here and say that because I know it to
be true, but I’m not above saying that it hasn’t always been easy for me to
believe that myself. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This was the most painful thing
we experienced in our marriage, but it brought us closer together and closer to
God. It made me a stronger person and gave me a testimony that I wouldn’t have
otherwise. Looking back, I can say that I know that God wasn’t punishing me. I
know He was teaching me. And I know that His timing is perfect, even when it didn’t
seem like it. Remember not to judge God’s goodness in your life on a snapshot.
Our understanding of time is not the same as God’s.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I thought I could control everything. I thought that if I
worked hard enough, I would get what I was longing for and it would all work
out. He reminded me that I’m nothing without him. And my inability to control
this situation broke me. It forced me to rely on someone other than myself. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“I will turn their mourning into
gladness; I will give them comfort and joy instead of sorrow.” – Jeremiah 31:13<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I saw infertility. I thought I
knew it. But, until you experience it yourself, you can’t possibly know."</span><o:p></o:p></div>
Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-71375035719045152152014-01-11T22:18:00.001-06:002014-01-11T22:18:59.184-06:00January 11, 2014<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Dearest Nola, </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Happy 1 year! Sweet girl, we did it! We started this journey a year ago today, both knowing very little about who we were in our new roles. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You - a tiny human trying to figure out your schedule, who you could count on to take care of you, when you should sleep, what life was going to be like, etc. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Me - a woman trying to find my way, figuring out how to take care of said tiny person, how to function on no sleep, realizing how life was going to be so different, etc.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">A few years ago, I was pretty sure this day would never come. A day when I could celebrate my own baby girl's 12 month birthday. A day when I could truly thank God for giving me this blessing that I don't know how I even deserved it. So, thank you God for this miracle. I never knew I could have a beautiful, healthy baby and here you are celebrating your first birthday. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You are so full of love and life that other people want to be around you all the time. Your personality shines through and you light up the room when you enter. You are loud, active and keep us on our toes at all times. You are spunky, tough, stubborn, rotten, sweet, smart, funny, sassy and all together pretty perfect. I know I've been spoiled with such a good baby and I'm grateful for that. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I want to thank you for your beautiful smile and the fact that you know just the right time to use it. I truly think you are the most amazing and pretty little girl I've ever seen. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Being your mom has been more than I could ever dreamed or imagined. I truly had no idea what it would be like. I didn't know I would love you this much, that it would be this hard...this rewarding, this life-changing, this special. You are more than I thought you could be. And you've made me more than I thought I could be. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We made it. We've figured it out together. So, here's to 1 year in the books. I know I will blink and you'll be 18, so I'm doing my best to take it all in and appreciate every moment I have.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Nola, thank you for being you. My wishes for your future go beyond what I can type in words and I'm so very glad to be a part of it. All of it. I love you to the moon and back. You have no idea. </span><br />
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</span>Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-46345604279531719262013-12-11T23:27:00.002-06:002013-12-11T23:27:48.992-06:00December 11, 2013<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Dear little Nola, </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Happy 11 month birthday! I am already getting emotional thinking about you turning 1 year old next month. I must say we've had such an incredible journey thus far and time really does fly when you're having fun. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">This has been a busy month. We celebrated Thanksgiving at the house and you enjoyed some of the yummy food yourself. You've also celebrated your independence in feeding yourself the baby food pouches. It's quite funny watching you eat it because once you can't get any more food out, you instantly throw it down and start screaming. Such a predictable and funny little character, you are...</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">We have certainly established the fact that you hate socks, shoes, hats, gloves or really any accessories. Actually, if we can't get you dressed in about .2 seconds, you are already irritated. I think it's because you just want to be on the move. You get bored easily and you're on to the next thing. Sometimes things like diapers, clothes and stuff just slow you down and keep you from your exploring. Who has time for that? </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Big news happened this month - you started walking! At this point, you're great at standing up by yourself and taking steps. It's so cute to watch you pop up in the middle of the floor, get your bearings and just go. You're up to about 10 steps at a time now, but you are faster at crawling, so that's still the go-to if you are really determined to get somewhere. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">You were not a fan of the snow, but I'm hoping that changes when you get older. Daddy really wants to take you snowboarding in a few years. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but you will have to wear shoes and gloves for that as well. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">When you don't get your way or something isn't going right, you sometimes throw yourself on the floor kicking and screaming. I'm very concerned this is happening before you even turn one. Please tell me you're just getting your tantrums over with now and you'll completely skip that phase at age 2-3. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">In all seriousness, you are the light of my life. I feel so blessed to be your mom and can't imagine what our lives were like before you were here. You make me so proud and I love you more than I could express. I hope you always know that. Thanks for being a little ball of personality!</span></span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh_THRamAzYgI4uaEOM8sUd0sqL_bD8YRO9jyspDuv0Oc19oSacWU78Ywx9MfYRC7Ksn8VzSiwxnHjglcijJ_aSuWyMLsxzZusJaYASh58n8Ge7_QKOOgo2o8dlFPdM8Q7PuNL7zw9Wx2Y/s1600/IMG_5874.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh_THRamAzYgI4uaEOM8sUd0sqL_bD8YRO9jyspDuv0Oc19oSacWU78Ywx9MfYRC7Ksn8VzSiwxnHjglcijJ_aSuWyMLsxzZusJaYASh58n8Ge7_QKOOgo2o8dlFPdM8Q7PuNL7zw9Wx2Y/s640/IMG_5874.JPG" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I can't believe how big you look here</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0nBLGkQlKzJZN5AEgUIh3w3c6Hz_SAPXlCu9Nc3mUXOkODkDOGsjJs4ROhQWmilD2xtWnvxEQsZ-PU5loYGNP40n52A1r-ECr0APiirbkIdtKYTLRUfxEC4VHI4aet8SMWIq3C6u9PJs/s1600/IMG_5880.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0nBLGkQlKzJZN5AEgUIh3w3c6Hz_SAPXlCu9Nc3mUXOkODkDOGsjJs4ROhQWmilD2xtWnvxEQsZ-PU5loYGNP40n52A1r-ECr0APiirbkIdtKYTLRUfxEC4VHI4aet8SMWIq3C6u9PJs/s640/IMG_5880.JPG" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Happy girl</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1mrDROMPqzYKsuI676RGtRr81Za_K_r529e8KV9nOCZYnOVW5M4q-EbvCn8kN-UifVzOdCkbOXEjUxTeF1pQJ1yj8Q9cmbmED_HjL2UVvS6wxfSC9-NWFjGvDxPGDXwMLVHynCCrZB_c/s1600/IMG_5883.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1mrDROMPqzYKsuI676RGtRr81Za_K_r529e8KV9nOCZYnOVW5M4q-EbvCn8kN-UifVzOdCkbOXEjUxTeF1pQJ1yj8Q9cmbmED_HjL2UVvS6wxfSC9-NWFjGvDxPGDXwMLVHynCCrZB_c/s640/IMG_5883.JPG" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This face immediately followed the smiling photo directly above this one</td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></span>Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-35951039977721333942013-11-11T23:00:00.003-06:002013-11-12T06:33:10.812-06:00November 11, 2013<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Dear Nola Mae,</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Happy 10 months! You have reached double digits and your first birthday is right around the corner. It's so much fun watching you grow up, learn new things and become your own person. You are little miss independent. You want to do things the way you want to, when you want to and how you want to ... and no one can tell you any differently. It's pretty funny to watch your little sassy personality shine through. You are a silly little girl - always making your dad and I laugh. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">You are so close to walking, but still not sure about it yet. You still love bath time and playing with toys. Though, your favorite things to play with are things that aren't for babies. You live for danger and exploration. I'm excited to see where that takes you in life. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">You hate when we take something from you (which is why you're holding a comb in your photos below - it wasn't worth the tears for the photos). Stubborn already - oh boy. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">You've recently started going through the separation anxiety/attachment issues. There are times when you only want me and no one else will do. This isn't very fun when I have a lot of work to do around the house and you're screaming your head off. But, I imagine there might come a day when you don't want me near you, so I should probably just enjoy it while it lasts. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Everyday is an adventure with you ... everyday is something new to look forward to and it really is such a blessing to be your mom. We're figuring it all out and I'm enjoying the journey. I do try to enjoy the little moments we share and soak it all in. These are memories I never want to forget. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Thanks for being my sweet girl. I love you to the moon and back. </span></span><br />
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<br />Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-59946031464848710372013-10-11T08:46:00.000-05:002013-10-11T08:46:06.858-05:00October 11, 2013<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Dear Nola, </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Happy 9 month birthday pretty girl. Today also happens to be your aunt Starr's birthday and your pawpaw Cecil's birthday, so it's a special day. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This month, there were a few things that happened that forced me to be painfully aware of just how precious our time is. I won't go into detail here, but I do think it's important to recognize and acknowledge that. Your dad and I have had many talks about setting our priorities and doing our best to stick to them. There aren't enough hours in the day to get everything done, so I'm trying to not feel guilty about that and instead spend quality time as a family. What matters most is being together, making memories and soaking it all in. I know that every second counts and I have a feeling my friends would tell me that is ever so true, after their experiences this month. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I love so many things about you and your personality is definitely one of them. You have some spunk for sure. You throw fits when you don't get your way and the smallest things can set you off. It's funny now, but I'm sure I won't always think so. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You now have two teeth and I think more are well on their way. I love when you look at me and smile with those two bottom teeth showing. You are always looking for something to do ... always active. You get around really fast and you're still figuring everything out, so that's led to some head bumps and bruises this month. You are testing the limits of standing on your own without holding onto anything and you are really wanting to walk on your own. You have found the stairs and you think it's funny to climb all the way up as fast as you can. It gets more fun and exciting every day (also a little scary at times). </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I am so proud to be your mom. I love you baby Nola.</span><br />
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Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-16053252925478671192013-09-11T22:02:00.001-05:002013-09-11T22:02:47.552-05:00September 11, 2013<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Dear Nola, </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You can not be 8 months old already. It's bittersweet because of course I want you to grow up healthy and strong, but I also want you to stay little for just a little longer. 8 months seems so much older and I can't believe how quickly time is passing by. I guess that will be a reoccurring theme of our lives from here on out. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It seems as if you've done a lot this month. You've gone from barely sitting up on your own to crawling, exploring, standing up and trying new foods. You're quite advanced and adventurous, which gives your mom a small heart attack almost daily. Gone are the days where I can sit you on the bed and get ready for work in the mornings. You get bored quickly and are on the move before I know it (as seen in the photo series below). </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Though you have an abundance of toys to play with, you gravitate toward the coffee table with hard wood edges and the fireplace made of brick. Daddy is worried you'll date a dangerous guy on a motorcycle one day. I say please don't. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You did get your first tooth this month and that was very exciting. It's a sharp little thing on your bottom gums, just left of center. You did pretty well with that - only one night where you fought sleep. You really are such a good baby. I thank God every day for you (and also that you like to sleep at night).</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We had the opportunity to have a wonderful weekend getaway at Big Cedar in Missouri. Dell and I usually take at least one trip a year and you've pretty much consumed 2013 for us. So, this was a last minute trip with just the three of us and it was fabulous. We went swimming, played mini golf and shuffleboard, cooked in our cabin, ate a delicious brunch, napped, went shopping, watched fireworks and floated in the lazy river. I wish I had a picture of this because you were in your own little turtle floaty and just held your head up like you owned the place. It was pretty cute and I look forward to more family trips in the future. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Thank you for another month of memories and love. You are such a special little girl and we love you so much. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-44250859920280144662013-08-11T17:11:00.001-05:002013-08-11T17:11:43.510-05:00August 11, 2013
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<span style="font-size: small;">Happy 7 months little Nola! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;">It really seems like the past month has flown by, even more so than the usual quickness of time elapsing. You are full of personality and still make
the best faces. You make dad and I laugh all the time. This month we've started to notice even more of your personality and I think you are going to have a little sass in ya (which can be good if used correctly). </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><o:p></o:p>You are just about to crawl – you’ve almost
got the hang of it, but you get so frustrated that you can’t make your legs and
arms do what you want that you throw a small fit. It’s pretty cute, though I
don’t think that’s your goal. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">You’ve tried some new fun foods this month
and you’ve mastered the art of sitting up on your own.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">You had your first full night away from us and stayed with Mimi. We all enjoyed it, but of course we missed you. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">You still love being outdoors and being active. If you are bored with what is going on, you have no problem letting us know. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">I'm still having a tough time figuring out what to do with your hair. The top is so cute and curly, but the back where you lay on your head is frizzy and funky. Though, it doesn't really matter because you're adorable no matter what. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;">Thanks for being such a sweet and fun baby. We love you to the moon and back. </span></span></div>
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Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-84292910925370996742013-07-11T22:29:00.002-05:002013-07-11T22:29:58.130-05:00July 11, 2013<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">My sweet baby girl is 6 months old. You are growing up so fast and I can't believe how much you've changed, even in the past two weeks. We've enjoyed the summer and making memories with you. For your first 4th of July, you were able to meet some of your cousins for the first time and then we went to Stillwater. Walking around OSU's campus with you was so special. Later, we spent time with the Corbins and finally watched fireworks with Ryan, Amanda, Brenton, Rylee, Piper and Grandpa Sewell. You loved watching them and only got startled one time with a really loud one. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">We also went to a Tulsa Drillers baseball game and you slept through most of the game, but we had a good time. When we first got to the park, I took you out of your car seat to see if you needed a diaper change. One minute later, you and I were both covered in poop. I had a change of clothes for you, but nothing for me. I now own a really cute Drillers t-shirt, so thanks for that. It's always an adventure with you and I love it. You keep things interesting and keep me on my toes. </span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjh7ujY3eehSAcvofhE78lfozcy5vpShK47l8Wl0Pctq1tqYB2lsFIzHdz6K4vDooLN8P1ct8-W5L16f8BZZwCejmZqIwH-KzdyfHhD8y0vqL5UaeW4KN7cKEuH8TSp_jSCkbqB_hyphenhyphen4nmg/s1600/baseball.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjh7ujY3eehSAcvofhE78lfozcy5vpShK47l8Wl0Pctq1tqYB2lsFIzHdz6K4vDooLN8P1ct8-W5L16f8BZZwCejmZqIwH-KzdyfHhD8y0vqL5UaeW4KN7cKEuH8TSp_jSCkbqB_hyphenhyphen4nmg/s320/baseball.jpg" width="233" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">You've tried all sorts of foods and so far you love everything except peas. You are still unsure about those, but we'll keep trying. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">We found that you love to be active. You like jumping in your jumpy jump toy, swinging and swimming. You are pretty much always on the move. This makes changing your diaper or your clothes very difficult. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Your hair is now long enough to put into two pigtails. It is so curly and beautiful. I love it and hope you will embrace it later in life as well. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I love your little personality and watching it develop. You are still a happy and content baby. There are these moments when you smile that big gummy grin and look up at me and I just melt. I love how you are so genuine and pure with your emotions - when you're happy, your entire face lights up and there's no denying it. It's one of my favorite qualities you have right now.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Thanks for another month of fun you little thing. I adore you.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</span></span>Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-74649581090581340572013-06-11T20:40:00.000-05:002013-06-11T20:40:32.769-05:00June 11, 2013<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Happy five months to you sweet girl. It's been another fun month and I'm enjoying this adventure with you. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You started cuddling this month and it's one of the best things ever. I enjoy our time together in the mornings before work and really cherish our weekends together. Everything is better with you around. </span><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We are celebrating Father's Day this weekend, so I'm looking forward to another memory made as a family. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Your dad and I are pretty silly and we make up songs all the time. Daddy wrote your favorite song "Hey pretty girl" and anytime you hear it, you look around for the person singing. It's pretty cute that you recognize it and know to look for it. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This month, we went to the lake for the weekend and you did great. You also took your first road trip to northwest Arkansas and you were wonderful in the car. You slept almost the entire way there and back. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Just this past weekend, you learned to roll over from your tummy back onto your back. Everything is so exciting and new. I love it.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You are constantly moving and "talking" - I think you will end up being a nice mixture of your mom and dad. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Thanks for being such a sweet girl and well behaved baby. People tell us all the time how fortunate we are and I couldn't agree more. You are a joy to be around and I love you so much.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Oh, </span><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I still haven't figured out what to do with your hair ... maybe next month ... or next year :)</span><br />
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Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-76997148691422909112013-05-11T23:46:00.000-05:002013-05-11T23:46:33.779-05:00May 11, 2013<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Happy four months! I can't believe how fast time has gone by, and I'm sure that will be the story of my life. You are such a little doll. You really have this wonderful personality - so sweet and happy. Your disposition is so pleasant and people love being around you. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You've really done a lot this month. You found your voice and it's the cutest thing I've ever heard. The way you move your tiny mouth is adorable and I love watching you and listening to you. You also learned how to roll over all the time. You enjoy doing it, but don't like being on your stomach, so that makes the whole rolling over thing not as much fun as you probably imagined it would be. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Your hair just keeps getting longer and longer. Pretty soon, I'm going to actually have to do something with it. For now, I just love the way it feels and how it lays down on your neck when we wash it during bath time. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You are a very active little girl - always on the go or kicking those legs. I hope you take your time learning how to crawl because I have a feeling you'll be across the house in no time. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I love being your mommy and I'm so excited to celebrate Mother's Day with you tomorrow. Thanks for being such a good girl for me and making me so proud. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I love you to the moon and back.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span>Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-46142105930340383992013-05-03T08:43:00.001-05:002013-05-03T08:43:59.897-05:00Easter and Dedication pictures<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-size: large;"> <span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: center;">Easter - 3/31/13</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Love her surprised look </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Shy girl playing with her dress</span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Our little family</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Nola's dedication at church - </span><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">4/7/13</span></span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Beautiful and delicious cake made by our friend and co-worker</span></span></td></tr>
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Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-6064666279537347042013-05-02T16:21:00.000-05:002013-05-02T16:21:34.665-05:00Clothes from Ghana<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Not long ago, I received a message to expect a package in the mail very soon. I had no idea what to expect, but the package arrived a few days ago and I couldn't wait to open it. I literally ran inside and threw everything else down so that I could get to the contents of the packing envelope. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The package was from my friend Caitlin, who currently lives in Africa. I met Caitlin at my current job and immediately loved her. She's a spunky, caring, smart, beautiful, young gal with a zest for life (and makeup). A few months after meeting her, she was accepted into the Peace Corps and would be leaving to live in Ghana for two years. I was sad to see her go, but happy she was getting this wonderful experience. We've kept in touch, thanks to technology, and we often send her care packages full of funny photos, junk food and treats she can't get over there. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">She posts the best pictures of her own African clothes that she helps put together - all the way from picking out the fabric to designing every detail. So, when I opened the package, I couldn't believe my eyes. I literally looked closely at each piece as I took it out. Touching the fabric, thinking about her putting these things together herself and imagining what my little girl is going to look like wearing them. I filled with pride and my eyes filled with tears. How very thoughtful of her to do something like this for us. To think of Nola and take the time to do this. I was overwhelmed and of course, I love the clothes. More importantly, I love the meaning behind them. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Thank you so much Caitlin. You have no idea how special this is. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">I couldn't get the picture turned the right way, but this is everything</span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This dress is pleated and oh, so girly. I love the orange!</span></td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This little pantsuit is adorable and I plan on using the top as a dress while she's little</span></td></tr>
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<br />Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-71879648554392400742013-04-12T15:41:00.001-05:002013-04-12T15:41:19.704-05:00Beautiful black and white photos<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-82744539002254878342013-04-11T21:36:00.002-05:002013-04-11T21:36:54.683-05:00April 11, 2013<br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Dear Nola, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You are 3 months old today. You continue to amaze us and
make us smile every day. You are such a happy baby and such a joy to be around.
You really only get fussy when it’s time to nap during the day. I think you
fight it because you don’t realize how awesome sleep is yet, also because you
don’t want to miss anything fun. If you are fussy and we want you to calm down,
daddy found the go-to move that you love. It calms you down every time. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You are still tall and skinny – always in the lower
percentile for weight and higher for length, but the doctor says everything
looks great. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I love your smiles, your little giggles, all those tiny baby
noises, your raised eyebrow and all the funny expressions you make. You are
still a good sleeper and I’m still ever so grateful for that. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I’ve had to go back to work, which means I’m missing you
throughout the day. However, we have been very fortunate with your babysitter
and I know you’re getting loved on even when I’m not around. I love the
pictures she sends me throughout the day and I look forward to seeing your
sweet face in person every evening throughout the week. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Thanks for being awesome. I love you little girl.</span><br />
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Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-51460954517384480892013-03-22T15:06:00.000-05:002013-03-22T15:06:10.481-05:00I thought I got it<!--StartFragment-->
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I thought I got it. I had been an aunt for over a decade and
really loved that role. I adore my niece and nephews all so very much. I
babysat, went to every birthday party and spent as much time with them as I
could (even while living away at college or in Arkansas). I’ve watched all of
my closest friends become mommies and see how their schedules and priorities
changed. So, when I was pregnant and people would say things like “it’s just different” when
describing their new lives or “you just change,” I thought I understood. I
thought I got it. But, I didn’t. You can’t truly GET IT until you are a parent.
And there’s nothing anyone could have said to me to make me understand. </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When
you see your baby for the first time, you start to get it. You realize your
life will never be the same. You are in love with this little being whom you’ve
just met. This person is a piece of you living outside of your body. As time
goes on, you understand even more. You think you can’t possibly love anyone
more than your child at this moment. Then, that little baby does something that
makes you proud….it can be something simple like smile, or roll over, or hold
their head up…and just when you thought you couldn’t love anyone any more, you
do. </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Being a parent changes you. It changes everything, including your most important relationships. </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Dell and I have a really great marriage. Those of you that know me know that I'm not bragging. For those of you that don't know me as well, you'll have to trust me. I've had the other side of that coin too, which is probably why I know and appreciate how great I have it now. But, before Nola arrived, I didn't realize I could love Dell more than I did. When he says he wants to do housework to allow me to focus my time and attention on Nola, or he helps change diapers without complaining, or even when I see him smile at his little girl, just beaming with pride...it makes me feel overwhelmed with
happiness. This is my family. It's pretty great. </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Having a baby has also made my relationship with God even
stronger. I enjoy reading the bible to Nola every night and praying for her.
And I really recognize the importance of showing her God’s love as she gets older. </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I was in the car the other day and heard this gospel song that really struck me. It says something like this: </span></div>
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<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You loved me through
my good and through my bad. </span></i></div>
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<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You keep on loving me.You never stop. </span></i></div>
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<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Through every mistake, every issue…you could’ve given up, but instead you lift
me up. You keep on teaching me.</span></i></div>
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<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You gave your life for
me. Who else would’ve done that?
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It made me realize that His love truly is like a father. Only a parent could love you like this. Only a parent would
remain committed to you no matter how many times you hurt them or how often you ignore them.
Only a parent could continue to lift you up every time you fall, teach you everything they possibly can and give their life for
you to find happiness. Other relationships may not last in those circumstances. It would be easy to walk away. But, not for parents. It's unconditional love in the truest sense of the word. Recognizing His love in that context was a beautiful
thing for me to see. </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My relationship with myself is also different. In an
instant, somehow my life became both more and less important. I would give
myself up in a moment to save her, but I also want to be here to be the best
mother and watch her grow up to accomplish her dreams. I am a different person today than I was last year. I'm more than I ever thought I could be and I'm proud of myself. </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So, while I understand what it's like to be a parent now, I realize I'm still very new at this. And I'm sure there will be lots of surprises down the road. But, I'm forever grateful to <b>get this</b> feeling today. </span></div>
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Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-3356173192347150232013-03-11T16:12:00.000-05:002013-03-11T16:12:06.328-05:00March 11, 2013<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Dear Nola, </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Happy two month birthday! Another month down in the books and it's been a fun one. We've really worked on your schedule and I'm ever so grateful Nighttime Nola has taken a rest and let mommy sleep at night. You've really done a good job with everything and you make me proud every day. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This month I've really enjoyed my time with you. You change so much all the time, so I'm trying to take in every moment and enjoy it before I have to go back to work. We spend a lot of time listening to music. I'll sing to you while we're dancing in the living room and you laugh at me. You've really come into your own this month and we're starting to see more of your personality. I love your big grin and how you just look up at your painting from daddy every time we change your diaper. I do hope you grow up with an appreciation for art of all kinds. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You do okay for bath time sometimes, but for the most part I think you still don't understand it. In the evenings your belly seems to get a bit upset and you get fussy about that. But, you are a happy baby and that makes me really happy too. You seem content, which means I'm doing something right. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You are really great at holding up your head, playing on your activity mat and you're just a good baby. We are blessed to have you in our lives. Love you so much sweet girl. </span><br />
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<br />Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-67576680882047456672013-02-11T20:07:00.000-06:002013-02-11T20:07:02.413-06:00February 11, 2013<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Dear Nola, </span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Happy one month birthday! I can't believe it's already been a full month since you arrived into our arms and our world. You are such the miracle baby and such a blessing to us. I am so grateful you are healthy and happy. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I can't stop staring at your face. It's just so cute. I can't believe you're mine. I love your chubby cheeks, your skinny legs, your head full of curly hair, the way you hold my hand so tightly, your long feet, those beautiful eyes staring up at me, tickling your full belly, laughing at the hair on your ears, cuddling with you, your eyebrows and the angry faces you make when you scrunch them up, those perfect lips, your tiny tush, your smiles, your loud belches and toots, seeing you wrapped up like a little burrito and making memories with you every day. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I love how you have changed so much already. One day I think you look like daddy, one day like me, but mostly I think you are 100% Nola and that's awesome. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I am so grateful to be your mom. Your dad and I love you very much. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span></span>Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-42745496552896698352013-01-23T21:26:00.001-06:002013-01-23T21:26:42.882-06:00Things I've learned or been surprised by so far<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">A little less than two weeks in and here are some honest, random and somewhat raw thoughts from a new mom:</span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span></span> <br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I've never been so tired in my entire life. I knew it would be hard, but didn't realize how hard not sleeping all night would be on me. I'm grateful for last night when she was so much easier on me. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Breastfeeding is a real pain in the butt right now. Note to self: calling lactation consultants for advice might send you over the edge of feeling like a mommy failure. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I miss spending time with my husband.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Hormones make you crazy. I wasn't emotional my entire pregnancy and now I feel like I cry all the time ... reading a book to Nola, Dell saying something sweet about her or I, thinking about her growing up too fast or even a Disney cruise commercial. Honestly. When did I become <i>that</i> girl? </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Taking care of a tiny human is scary. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I never knew I could love someone I just met so much. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I'm so grateful to everyone who's helped me thus far. Whether through just talking, bringing food over, sending gifts or helping with the care of baby Nola. It's really made all the difference...(mom, don't leave!)</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I prayed for a baby that liked to sleep. I didn't realize I needed to be more specific and ask for the exact times I wanted her to sleep (she currently sleeps all day and is awake all night). I also didn't realize I needed to pray that she would wake up to eat every few hours. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I can't stand to hear her cry or see that bottom lip come out. I just want to protect her forever. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I will take advice and try just about anything to make sure I'm doing what's best for her. It's overwhelming at times, and I just want her to be happy. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I'm obsessed with her - the funny faces she makes, that tiny little body, those chubby cheeks and all that hair - I love everything!</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Seeing Dell with her makes me love and respect him even more. He's already the best daddy and I can't wait for our adventure to continue. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I love our little family. As Dell says, she's the best thing that's ever happened to us.</span></span><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I know how blessed I am to have this healthy baby girl and I want to cherish every moment.</span></span>Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-86746723455080391102013-01-22T20:46:00.001-06:002013-05-11T23:49:32.508-05:00Labor and Delivery<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">At our last doctor's appointment on January 4, I was dilated to a 2-3 and having contractions almost every night. Because of this and the fact that we knew the baby was a good size, the doctor said we could induce the following week (at 39 weeks gestation). So, it was decided that she would make her entrance into the world on Friday, 1/11/13. The night before, Dell suggested we go out for a nice dinner with just the two of us to celebrate the big event. It was wonderful - great service, delicious food and romantic. I was having pretty regular contractions at dinner. Dell was timing them and thought we should hurry up, get home and call the doctor. I didn't want to miss the molten chocolate lava cake. Priorities people! After dinner, we got home and rested a bit, but I couldn't sleep much. I was so anxious to meet her and I had one last blog post I needed to write. So, at 4 a.m. I translated the thoughts in my head to the computer screen and wrote the letter to Dell. Now, I was ready. </span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We got ready, loaded up the car and headed out. Our first stop was to the bagel shop to get breakfast for ourselves and delicious cookies for the nurses that would be taking care of me that day. Hey, I'm not above kissing up. Dell ate his breakfast, but I was in a hurry and didn't get to eat mine. This later proved to be a big mistake. I drove to the hospital and sped the entire way. It was fun having an excuse to be in such a hurry and it kept Dell entertained as well. We checked in at 7:30 a.m. and the day officially began.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I was introduced to my nurse, Staci and she started all the paperwork and the IV. I knew she was going to be great, but didn't know at the time just how much I would love having her at my side until later. </span></span><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I was already having
contractions before they started the pitocin, which was a good sign. My doctor made his rounds and came to break my water around 8 a.m. It felt weird. Not too painful, but I did feel pressure. The show was officially on the road. The doctor said the baby already had her first poop and he knew that because my water was greenish. This is not good, as it is very likely Nola swallowed some of the meconium and would need extra attention upon her arrival. No matter what, NICU would be here for her delivery and make sure to suck everything out. That was scary and not how I wanted to start the process. But I knew this could happen and wanted to stay positive no matter what. Of course I was worried, but I had to have faith everything would be okay. </span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The contractions became more regular and more painful than they had been as time went on. When Staci checked me again, I was dilated to a 4-5 and I was ready for the epidural. I felt like I had experienced labor and knew what it felt like and my body was ready for some relief. My contractions were off the charts, so I was looking forward to that medicine to help ease the pain. My mom and sister left the room and Dell was able to stay in and hold me up while the anesthesiologist administered the epidural. The numbing shot was painful and then I felt warmth and pressure. It was odd, but within about 20 minutes, I was feeling much better. It wasn't long after that when we had our big scare. Staci was watching my monitors and saw that I was having a very intense and long contraction. The next thing I knew there was another nurse by my bed and they were talking to each other. Staci asked a question and then ran out of the room. This is never a good sign. She came back with a shot to stop the contractions. She put that in my arm and turned off the pitocin. After everything calmed down, she explained that I had a 5 minute long contraction and she wasn't sure why. They put me on oxygen and monitored me and the baby very closely. Apparently during that contraction, my blood pressure dropped to something like 70/30 and Nola's heartbeat went from about 150 to 70bpm. These are obviously major signs of distress for both of us and Staci told me later she was really scared. I'm thankful I couldn't feel the contraction and that they acted quickly to make sure everything was okay with us. They eventually started the pitocin back up and I was able to get rid of the oxygen mask. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Throughout the day, Staci kept putting me in different positions to try and get Nola to turn the right way. She was head down, but still face up and the stubborn little girl wouldn't turn her head. I labored all day and the doctor kept asking about my progress. Not much new to report. I think we all assumed I would be having her earlier in the afternoon since I was having contractions on my own before and was already dilated. Nola had other plans. I was tired, but not really able to sleep. More than anything, I was starving because I hadn't eaten anything since the night before. I think at one point, I threatened to kill for a burrito. Luckily, no one was harmed by my hungry anger. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">At one point during the night, my alarm on my epidural went off. They assured me there was still medicine in there and I should push the button for extra relief. I pushed the button, but no relief came. The dreaded had happened. The epidural had worn off after me being in labor all day. The pain was really intense and each contraction had me on the verge of tears. After about 20 minutes, another anesthesiologist came in and refilled the cartridge and I was feeling better again. I was so worried I was going to have to push through that pain. The entire day, I am happy to say I remained calm and positive. I handled labor and delivery much better than I thought I would. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Finally, I was fully effaced and dilated. It was time to push around 8 p.m. Staci's shift ended at 7 p.m. and I didn't want her to leave. She jokingly said as long as I didn't make her stay until like 10 p.m., she would stay with me and deliver this baby. What a relief! I pushed for about 2 hours. It was hard and tiring, but I did it. Finally, my doctor arrived and said it was time to get this baby out. Nola's heart rate was starting to drop with my contractions and pushing, so we had to move quickly. I was scared, but tried to do whatever I could to get her out safely. Staci stayed the entire time. I am so grateful to her for that. She was amazing!</span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">After about 20 minutes of pushing with the doctor in the room, he said he was going to have to use forceps to get her out. I knew this was an option and was grateful he was willing to try this before resorting to a c-section. So, he coached me through everything and before I knew it, her head was out (she was still face up). Then, a pause, then her body came out and I heard her cry. I looked over at Dell and he was sobbing saying "That's my daughter. My baby girl. She's so beautiful." It was the sweetest and most perfect moment ever. My mom and sister were crying and Dell cut the umbilical cord. I felt so blessed. I got to see all her hair and it was adorable. NICU took her out of the room and Dell, mom and Starr followed. I finished the rest of my duties and waited to hold my sweet girl. Dell finally came back into the room and let me watch a video he took on his phone of them working on Nola. It was beautiful and allowed me to see her before they brought her in to me. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The nurses brought her in the room to weigh her in front of me. 7 lbs 14 oz and the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen. I was finally able to hold her and get some skin on skin time. It was just Dell and I in the room looking at her and we couldn't believe we did this. It felt amazing. I was just so happy that everything went as well as it did with all the complications. And, in the end, all you can ask for is a healthy baby - we got that!</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Thanks again to everyone for their love and support. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">She got a 9 and/or 10 on her apgar test, passed her hearing tests and measured a long 21" (I always felt like she was taking up a lot of room in my ribs). She made her entrance at 10:05 p.m. on Friday, January 11, 2013. We stayed in the hospital until Sunday, January 13 and brought her home that evening. </span></span>Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-53842580000377230872013-01-11T05:15:00.002-06:002013-01-11T05:15:41.362-06:00Dear Dell,<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I wanted to thank you for being such an amazing husband and friend throughout my pregnancy and always. I always knew I wanted children and a family, but I never longed for children or felt it was right until I met you. I was so excited to start our life together and couldn't wait to see what kind of family we would have. Then, we struggled with infertility. I remember feeling so scared that I may never get to know what it would be like to have that family I imagined. I hoped and prayed, but I doubted too. When the worry set in, you never waivered in your support and willingness to try and figure things out. When I questioned everything and worried that I couldn't provide you with a child, you never gave up. So, WE never gave up ... which is why I think God has blessed us to bring us where we are today. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I've had a fairly easy and uneventful pregnancy. I've really tried to not be overly emotional, hormonal or just a complete mess. I think I've stayed pretty true to myself and made an effort to not complain much, even when I wasn't feeling well. But, I can remember at least a couple times when I was in nesting mode or just feeling overwhelmed with all the things I needed to do. And that's when I didn't feel like myself. Let's face it ... I got the crazy eye or snapped at you for no reason. And instead of saying, what the heck is wrong with you, you crazy woman?!?!? You simply said "have I done something to upset you babe?" Or, "what can I do to help?" You've taken everything in stride and rolled with the punches. You've been such a great support system and partner. I hope I've made you proud in how I've carried myself while carrying your baby girl.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">It's been such an amazing journey and I have enjoyed being on the adventure with you. From wondering if we'd ever get to this point to thinking about meeting our little one in just a matter of hours, it's still unbelievable to me. We are so blessed. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">You are silly, caring, thoughtful, loyal, genuine, a man of integrity and you have the biggest heart. I love you for these reasons and so many more. And when I think about our little girl, I am excited because I know those are the same qualities she will see and love in you. You have always taken such great care of me and I can't wait to see you as a father. I know you will be so good to Nola and she will love having you as her daddy. I'm so excited to start this next chapter of our lives together and I love you so very much. </span></span>Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-85135549748372551222013-01-08T18:10:00.000-06:002013-01-08T18:10:22.250-06:00The nursery<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyBpQrcbKaF7c6fGhhRG3E64RBFZWm40v2mYBEviqiSCWhWbvTwCgch8erpXsNV92kHnxy7PKREmO2oL_qK0GpTqDMi3p3fHkstxN1KI9PpeOA3p9-GfkqPgWbCpZgfNfv4kKYtJsrC_s/s1600/crib.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"> </a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyBpQrcbKaF7c6fGhhRG3E64RBFZWm40v2mYBEviqiSCWhWbvTwCgch8erpXsNV92kHnxy7PKREmO2oL_qK0GpTqDMi3p3fHkstxN1KI9PpeOA3p9-GfkqPgWbCpZgfNfv4kKYtJsrC_s/s1600/crib.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"> </a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyBpQrcbKaF7c6fGhhRG3E64RBFZWm40v2mYBEviqiSCWhWbvTwCgch8erpXsNV92kHnxy7PKREmO2oL_qK0GpTqDMi3p3fHkstxN1KI9PpeOA3p9-GfkqPgWbCpZgfNfv4kKYtJsrC_s/s1600/crib.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyBpQrcbKaF7c6fGhhRG3E64RBFZWm40v2mYBEviqiSCWhWbvTwCgch8erpXsNV92kHnxy7PKREmO2oL_qK0GpTqDMi3p3fHkstxN1KI9PpeOA3p9-GfkqPgWbCpZgfNfv4kKYtJsrC_s/s640/crib.jpg" width="476" /> </a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Her crib and bedding </span></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQ_2p0nbmSNSCgBOMIcrKngOeKOYPhn0Tyw14DosGITsqoIz-qRwOQgzM4hhj1aVBkY7kca0nzR-exVjgqGELkDVBCEDE9cb8Zu1FsF_3bMTWANhHF3Dv4gEw4Z_XE3M_HKQZt_6v7BKI/s1600/bedding.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQ_2p0nbmSNSCgBOMIcrKngOeKOYPhn0Tyw14DosGITsqoIz-qRwOQgzM4hhj1aVBkY7kca0nzR-exVjgqGELkDVBCEDE9cb8Zu1FsF_3bMTWANhHF3Dv4gEw4Z_XE3M_HKQZt_6v7BKI/s640/bedding.jpeg" width="478" /> </a></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The <span style="font-size: small;">framed poem from our wedding, written by Dell's cousin. P.S. thanks Jackie for the flowers</span></span></span> </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg06YA-ccFBpsYMXlvSLKqJzZgGeJLU2R-OvWNzbs7bMDjqHZ4DcsPeLcAsYkT7T7yludn_WmHRoj6G_ccdJgEFj5Rr1uT_tzVr9IZ0h4NALwE0H1K227EvjnlWz_CR06BsCAvGsO5ZGzw/s1600/poem.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg06YA-ccFBpsYMXlvSLKqJzZgGeJLU2R-OvWNzbs7bMDjqHZ4DcsPeLcAsYkT7T7yludn_WmHRoj6G_ccdJgEFj5Rr1uT_tzVr9IZ0h4NALwE0H1K227EvjnlWz_CR06BsCAvGsO5ZGzw/s640/poem.jpeg" width="478" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Books<span style="font-size: small;">helf and toy storag<span style="font-size: small;">e</span></span>. So many people bought us books and I can't wait to read to her.</span></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhaGRDkdpibRgCE3B-BbdTmmQpIk3v9jSo-Db_7t4Us-2XMLmlYwCQ0bkh9NIUGZ4QMr7KiDWDoz0waQGI2w5U8q3hCBnjXeOV1K0CxAKul9wcSgFBdDCE_F7Gb0QX62DITiBqYY8ymuGA/s1600/bookshelf.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhaGRDkdpibRgCE3B-BbdTmmQpIk3v9jSo-Db_7t4Us-2XMLmlYwCQ0bkh9NIUGZ4QMr7KiDWDoz0waQGI2w5U8q3hCBnjXeOV1K0CxAKul9wcSgFBdDCE_F7Gb0QX62DITiBqYY8ymuGA/s640/bookshelf.jpeg" width="478" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Changing table</span></span> </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh40Au8zOrGIG02JpEAoT05kT3XY4XwYS2NluRGMHSEARHyDso-e0wRrE5f8HZKipxfhJiaWJIv58I3CKHCLOuYpBIouHXxGacj-kQt8TpQ4pdS98YdfmBpA_-nHEhRoJB4cH0Rm1b4XVE/s1600/changing+table.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh40Au8zOrGIG02JpEAoT05kT3XY4XwYS2NluRGMHSEARHyDso-e0wRrE5f8HZKipxfhJiaWJIv58I3CKHCLOuYpBIouHXxGacj-kQt8TpQ4pdS98YdfmBpA_-nHEhRoJB4cH0Rm1b4XVE/s640/changing+table.jpeg" width="478" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Custom painting by Dell, just for <span style="font-size: small;">his baby girl</span>. We <span style="font-size: small;">have named her Elle the el<span style="font-size: small;">ephant.</span></span></span></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnq47XmyYJDnrK44jNcz6T7P408bZMwUVxrrMk7fknB5ycgMLCuWzLkqsGoY2q5KL_7fPNojyVUWZ0oyxafV8LJZvX5lyj51_-QHFeMHu85n5VEeGOkpTKAvYIrBfOOkdDvGmSIUfwyTw/s1600/painting.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="478" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnq47XmyYJDnrK44jNcz6T7P408bZMwUVxrrMk7fknB5ycgMLCuWzLkqsGoY2q5KL_7fPNojyVUWZ0oyxafV8LJZvX5lyj51_-QHFeMHu85n5VEeGOkpTKAvYIrBfOOkdDvGmSIUfwyTw/s640/painting.jpeg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<br />Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-75293235136597523652013-01-03T18:36:00.000-06:002013-01-03T18:36:23.482-06:00False labor<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">One week before Christmas I started having pains. They started in the afternoon at work and I really wasn't sure what they were. By the time I left work and was driving home, they were more intense and I was very uncomfortable. I did some research to figure out exactly what was going on and realized I was indeed having contractions. I wasn't quite 36 weeks yet and these weren't the normal Braxton Hicks I was used to. No, these caused me to stop whatever I was doing and pay attention. Cramping and pain from my stomach to my back and all the way down. They were not consistent, so I knew it wasn't anything to alert the doctor for just yet. I knew the best thing to do was to take it easy and drink lots of water. So, that's what I did. I finally went to bed around 2am and was able to sleep through the night. I haven't had anything so intense since that day. I was glad to experience it though, so it gave me some sort of idea as to what I can expect in early labor. </span></span>Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-23032254562506181332013-01-03T18:35:00.002-06:002013-01-03T18:35:35.242-06:00A gift<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">As most of you know, I am the youngest of three children. I often enjoyed my role as the baby of the family, but there were times it wasn't as fun. One time, for example, was when my older brother and sister made up a song about how I was only worth $0.99. It sounds really cruel. Kids can be harsh, can't they? But, it stuck with me all these years and it probably keeps me grounded when I need it most. We'll chalk it up to a life lesson. I promise I'm not bitter. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Let me explain. We didn't grow up with much money. In fact, we were pretty poor. So, that forced you to be resourceful with things. Most of my clothes were hand-me-downs from my sister and there were always brand-name things we wanted, but would never own because we simply couldn't afford them. Also, there were many toys my mom couldn't just go and buy upon our request. One of those toys was a Barbie car. I always wanted one and never had one. It wasn't a priority so I just didn't get it. Incidentally, I used a shoebox for a Barbie car. I thought it was clever. My siblings thought it was dumb and added that to a verse in the song about me only being worth 99 cents. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I guess at some point I told one of my friends this story. Fast <span style="font-size: small;">forward several months later when</span> she tells me she has a Christmas present for me. I open this:</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></span>
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfCDRMssFMC7559-4wM_tl_ACkJJi5EP73T7cSd2ZMNIVjx4GTww1QhPKeqwfxhetWb7DShQsQ-YofkzmKMSavetO1KnapfApfV24lS_yz6wz7Ydfd-F3LY8w6spXMjFDNNoYQKgIQzS4/s1600/photo.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfCDRMssFMC7559-4wM_tl_ACkJJi5EP73T7cSd2ZMNIVjx4GTww1QhPKeqwfxhetWb7DShQsQ-YofkzmKMSavetO1KnapfApfV24lS_yz6wz7Ydfd-F3LY8w6spXMjFDNNoYQKgIQzS4/s320/photo.JPG" width="320" /></a></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">That story about me not having a Barbie car stuck with her and she wanted to be sure I didn't go my entire life without one. I love it! I will share it with Nola one day, of course. What I really love about this is that it represents so much more than a toy. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">First of all, it shows she actually listened to me. I know I'm personally guilty of being in such a hurry at times that I don't truly listen to what the person is saying. I physically hear them, but am not actively listening and participating in the conversation. How thoughtful of her to listen, remember and think of me months later.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Also, I've said since I became pregnant with Nola that "I want to give her everything she needs, but not everything she wants." As a child, I didn't need this Barbie car. I needed food, shelter, love, etc. I received those things, but I did not receive everything I wanted. So, I found myself thinking many years down the road. I'm at the s<span style="font-size: small;">tore with Nola and she's begging me for <span style="font-size: small;">something she thinks she needs. <span style="font-size: small;">I </span></span></span>hope this car will be a reminder to Dell and I to never spoil her with things, but only with love and attention. Because I think I've turned out alright<span style="font-size: small;"> and I know she will too. </span> </span></span><br />
<br />Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-62405208903269410952013-01-03T13:54:00.000-06:002013-01-03T13:54:18.557-06:00Thank you<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:WordDocument> <w:View>Normal</w:View> <w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:TrackMoves/> <w:TrackFormatting/> <w:PunctuationKerning/> <w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/> <w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:DoNotPromoteQF/> <w:LidThemeOther>EN-US</w:LidThemeOther> <w:LidThemeAsian>X-NONE</w:LidThemeAsian> <w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript> <w:Compatibility> <w:BreakWrappedTables/> <w:SnapToGridInCell/> <w:WrapTextWithPunct/> <w:UseAsianBreakRules/> <w:DontGrowAutofit/> <w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/> <w:EnableOpenTypeKerning/> <w:DontFlipMirrorIndents/> <w:OverrideTableStyleHps/> </w:Compatibility> <m:mathPr> 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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">A special thanks to my friends, family and co-workers for all the fabulous gifts. You all have surprised Dell and I with your love and support beyond what we ever imagined. Thank you so much for everything you have done to help us prepare for our new little one and for showing her love already. Here are a few pictures from some of the showers and <span style="font-size: small;">s<span style="font-size: small;">ome </span></span>to prove she's going to be a Thunder fan:</span></span></div>
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Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5998077469472269046.post-31105299194195282612012-12-18T10:29:00.001-06:002012-12-18T10:29:45.214-06:00December 17, 2012<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I'm exactly one month away from my due date. I feel like this pregnancy has gone by so fast and I can't believe it's coming to an end. I'm ready and not ready at the same time. I'm excited to see her sweet face<span style="font-size: small;">, hold her hand, <span style="font-size: small;">snuggle with her and see Dell with his baby girl. </span><span style="font-size: small;">But, it's crazy to think that <span style="font-size: small;">literally everything is going to change from the moment <span style="font-size: small;">she's born. I know we<span style="font-size: small;">'ll have challenges and <span style="font-size: small;">things will be hard at times, but I also know it's going to be worth it<span style="font-size: small;">. I think my body is ready to have this <span style="font-size: small;">baby. My feet ar<span style="font-size: small;">e swollen, my weight is climbing and my back is giving up. <span style="font-size: small;">I know I will miss feeling her move in my belly and <span style="font-size: small;">always having her with me wherever I go. <span style="font-size: small;">And when she's here at least the sleepless nights will be spent holding her instead of just <span style="font-size: small;">tossing and turning trying to get comfortable (someone can rem<span style="font-size: small;">ind me of this when I'm compla<span style="font-size: small;">inin<span style="font-size: small;">g at 3 in the morning one day<span style="font-size: small;"> here in a couple of months). <span style="font-size: small;">If <span style="font-size: small;">I'm being honest, I'm scared and very anxious about this new advent<span style="font-size: small;">ure, but most of all I'm excited and feel very blessed to <span style="font-size: small;">experience it.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">35 Weeks</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">Her face at 32 Weeks</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span> Audrey Gracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03609307518168241260noreply@blogger.com1